I'm not very good at keeping up to my Blog, but my new years reselution is to try get at least one post a week on, I am now gunna rant and rave about anything that is everything, I'll talk of my struggles and worrys of motherhood and of every day life, I hope I do not bore you all stupid.x
Well it has been 16 months since I last posted (there or there abouts) My son Charlie is now 16 months old and is a right little man, he runs me ragged, it has been a really difficult ride with Charlie, when he was 3 months old it was his first Christmas, he was seriously ill, he had 2 types of Bhronchalitis and soon after that he had swine flu so we ended up staying 3 weeks in hospital for his first ever Christmas, it was horrible, we very nearly lost Charlie twice during his illnesses, but he pulled through, I spent many a day and night crying my eyes out but I had a select few people around me that was there for me and kept me held up (they know who they are so I wont mention names). Though these people were beyond fantastic with me I was petrified, I could not beleive that God would bless me with such a precious little thing and then take him away from me, I never dared to voice my fears of loosing Charlie because I didnt want people telling me not to be so stupid and weirdly enough I couldn't cope with people been nice to me, My wonderful farther in law often came in to see us and every time he walked through the door in to our little room I broke down, I broke down hard because I could see in his face that he was terrified of what would happen, he was trying to stay strong because he knew I couldn't be strong, as I write this down remembering all of this it has brought tears to my eyes, Keith if you ever read this I thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you did for me, I thank you so much, you are a god send and im so honoured to have you in my life.x
Since his majour illness he has come on in leaps and bounds he is just like any other child his age but on medications (even now to this very day) but he gets by and is a happy smiley little lad.
We currently live at a friends house after been evicted from our old house due to having a dog and even though nothing was wrote in the half an A4 sheet of paper of a tenency agreement about not having pets we had to leave, we have been living with a friend and his 2 sons for over 2 months now and it is extreamly difficult, Charlie, Joel and I are having to share a bedroom which gives us no alone time, and sitting downstairs with everyone around alot is even really difficult because there is no privacy, so needless to say I am rather frustrated, please dont get me wrong, im so unbelivably grateful to have such a wonderful friend that has taken us in and given up his bedroom for us to use but I really want my own place again, with privacy were we can shut the world out and enjoy time just as a family.
We no longer have our beloved Doggy Eva, we had to reholme her due to living at a friends house and I miss her daily.x
There is a fair few issues I still suffer with in my own personal self but most of it has been hidden away and is not bothering me so much any more, though I have gone through more downs than ups since I last spoke on here I have been better able to handle them due to having such wonderful friends and family and of course Joel whome I love with all my heart, if it were not for him I can honestly say I wouldnt be here today.x
I am still extreamly paranoid, I often think that Joel's siblings do not like me, like im not a good enough person to be around, I spent alot of time looking after Barbara when I met Joel, I never knew her before her illness kicked in but I grew attatched to her, she needed looking after and needed so much attention I formed a ver serial bond with her and now that she has gone in to a home perminantly I feel rather upset at the fact no one ever asks me if I would like to go see Barbara at her home, They always tell me because of Joel and Charlie, I am part of the family but if that is true then why do I not get treat like part of the family (not including Keith in this) but no one invites me to nights out or to go see Barbara or anything, I do get invited to go to the house for lunch but thats it, not to sound like im a jelous cow but Naomi (Joel's brother's new wife) gets treat like family, long before she married in to the family she got treat like family, I mean for god's sake I gave them a new generation to the Grainger family and still nothing! It has really upset me and yes I have spoke to Joel about it and he tells me its nothing to do with likes and dislikes but I say plerghhh, if they dunt like me thats their choice but I'd rather know than not know.x
Over the next few days (when i have a spare 10 mins) I'll be gracing you with a poem I wrote for Joel before I even knew him.x
Rant over for now :-)
So for now I grace you all good night and Happy New Year.x
Sunday, 1 January 2012
Sunday, 7 November 2010
Well Here He is.x
It has been a while since I last made a post.x Things with my pregnancy pretty much stayed the same, I had to have a Cyst removed from my private area about 3 weeks before I had my baby. I had to have an epidural to have the thing removed but all went well, I stayed in hospital for 3 days before they let me out! That was a bloody nightmare. My Baby was due on the 26th August 2010 but did not arrive till 3rd September 2010. At my 20 week scan I found out I was having a boy so me and Joel decided there and then he was going to be called Charlie.x He did not want to arrive on time though and I was getting really impatiant about him not coming to meet us.x
Eventually I went through hell, I went to the midwifes to find out I was one cm dialated, 5 days later I started contracting really bad and went to hospital to be told I was 2 cm dialated, and got sent home. 2 hours later I could not take it no more, I had tried soaking in the bath but didnt work, I couldnt get in to bed I was in that much pain so Joel phoned the hospital and they said to bring me back in, I got my sister out of bed and we rushed back to hospital, Shelley was so good with me helping me walk to the car then to the hospital then to my bed, when we got there and they tested me and I was only 3 cm dialated, thank god midwife's care though because they should have sent me home again but they could see what pain and stress I was in and they said we can not send you home so they set me up for the night with gas and air but that was not working at all. Poor Joel and Shelley did not know what to do, One minute I wanted my back rubbing then I didnt want to be touched. I was given 2 dose's of pethadene throughout my time there though as I was so drugged up I cant tell you times and things as it was all a blur to me! eventually after 12 hours of pure hell in labour I eventually asked for an epidural and the midwifes (apparently) were 100 % grateful to me for asking for it! I can not tell you how many centimeters I was dialated at this time because I do not know, I later found out that Joel was taking my sister home when I eventually asked for epidural, funny enough I do not remember even asking for it haha!
After a further 6 hours of labour (me sleeping through it all thanks to the epidural) I was 8 cm dialated and that is when we got told that the baby's head was stuck facing to the side of me so I had to be rushed in for an emergancy C-Section. Finally at 4.46pm on Friday 3rd September 2010 Charlie arrived weighing in at 7 lb 14 and a half ounce.
All was not over though, it took the midwifes and doctors ages to get Charlie to breath and scream, when he eventually did cry I saw the Midwife lift Charlie up and I remember thinking look at all that hair! Joel got a quick cuddle before they rushed him of to ICU for an hour to be checked on.x I was so drugged up I kept on drifting in and out if sleep so it was not till later that I was annoyed at not getting to see my son! Joel went to ICU to take pictures for me whilst I was on the phone to Shelley as she was in tears, Due to me having a C-Section she was not allowed to be there for my son's birth. After she was not allowed to go see Charlie or to come see me! Joel got back just after I finished on the phone to Shelley and I sent him out to her, Told him to get her a drink and bring her back up with him at 7pm as it was well after 6 anyway I knew he wouldn't mind as Charlie was still in ICU anyway.
Eventually alot of really bad things happened which I will not go in to! But things between Joel and some one else are now very strained.
I eventually got left alone with my new baby and I was heart broken, my poor little man was so sick because of me, my amniotic fluid was infected which I had to have antibiotics for and so did Charlie because he had taken in the infection! What was worse is I was so tired and drugged up and sore I physically could not get out of bed to look after him, I hurt my self so much trying to reach for the buzzer to call a midwife to my aid and they took off with him for the night so I could rest and not worry about him.
I had been in hospital for 3 days before I felt well enough to go out for a smoke, but Joel had to push me in a wheel chair. We had spent so much time in hospital from my cyst been removed to Charlie been born that I knew the midwifes really well and we knew where everything we needed were.x I had been in hospital for 6 days by the time they let me out on the 8th September. I was so thankful that they let me out as the next day it was my birthday! It was much harder been at home with him as I could not lift him, I could not stand up for long and I was so tired that I was thankful Joel had 2 weeks off work to help me out.x I was in and dated with visitors once I had gotten home and that made me feel even worse!
Now Charlie is 2 month old, he hardly cries, he is such a good baby, he eats well with a 5 ounce bottle every 3 hours and he sleeps all way through the night! He has the cutest dimples when he smiles and he is trying to laugh now which is sooo cute.x Everyone loves him, everyone wants to look after him so much so that I am going to start saying no as I want him in a routine and I want him to know who his mummy and daddy is! Best thing about it is that I am his mummy and I have the right to say Yes or No without feeling guilty!
Eventually I went through hell, I went to the midwifes to find out I was one cm dialated, 5 days later I started contracting really bad and went to hospital to be told I was 2 cm dialated, and got sent home. 2 hours later I could not take it no more, I had tried soaking in the bath but didnt work, I couldnt get in to bed I was in that much pain so Joel phoned the hospital and they said to bring me back in, I got my sister out of bed and we rushed back to hospital, Shelley was so good with me helping me walk to the car then to the hospital then to my bed, when we got there and they tested me and I was only 3 cm dialated, thank god midwife's care though because they should have sent me home again but they could see what pain and stress I was in and they said we can not send you home so they set me up for the night with gas and air but that was not working at all. Poor Joel and Shelley did not know what to do, One minute I wanted my back rubbing then I didnt want to be touched. I was given 2 dose's of pethadene throughout my time there though as I was so drugged up I cant tell you times and things as it was all a blur to me! eventually after 12 hours of pure hell in labour I eventually asked for an epidural and the midwifes (apparently) were 100 % grateful to me for asking for it! I can not tell you how many centimeters I was dialated at this time because I do not know, I later found out that Joel was taking my sister home when I eventually asked for epidural, funny enough I do not remember even asking for it haha!
After a further 6 hours of labour (me sleeping through it all thanks to the epidural) I was 8 cm dialated and that is when we got told that the baby's head was stuck facing to the side of me so I had to be rushed in for an emergancy C-Section. Finally at 4.46pm on Friday 3rd September 2010 Charlie arrived weighing in at 7 lb 14 and a half ounce.
All was not over though, it took the midwifes and doctors ages to get Charlie to breath and scream, when he eventually did cry I saw the Midwife lift Charlie up and I remember thinking look at all that hair! Joel got a quick cuddle before they rushed him of to ICU for an hour to be checked on.x I was so drugged up I kept on drifting in and out if sleep so it was not till later that I was annoyed at not getting to see my son! Joel went to ICU to take pictures for me whilst I was on the phone to Shelley as she was in tears, Due to me having a C-Section she was not allowed to be there for my son's birth. After she was not allowed to go see Charlie or to come see me! Joel got back just after I finished on the phone to Shelley and I sent him out to her, Told him to get her a drink and bring her back up with him at 7pm as it was well after 6 anyway I knew he wouldn't mind as Charlie was still in ICU anyway.
Eventually alot of really bad things happened which I will not go in to! But things between Joel and some one else are now very strained.
I eventually got left alone with my new baby and I was heart broken, my poor little man was so sick because of me, my amniotic fluid was infected which I had to have antibiotics for and so did Charlie because he had taken in the infection! What was worse is I was so tired and drugged up and sore I physically could not get out of bed to look after him, I hurt my self so much trying to reach for the buzzer to call a midwife to my aid and they took off with him for the night so I could rest and not worry about him.
I had been in hospital for 3 days before I felt well enough to go out for a smoke, but Joel had to push me in a wheel chair. We had spent so much time in hospital from my cyst been removed to Charlie been born that I knew the midwifes really well and we knew where everything we needed were.x I had been in hospital for 6 days by the time they let me out on the 8th September. I was so thankful that they let me out as the next day it was my birthday! It was much harder been at home with him as I could not lift him, I could not stand up for long and I was so tired that I was thankful Joel had 2 weeks off work to help me out.x I was in and dated with visitors once I had gotten home and that made me feel even worse!
Now Charlie is 2 month old, he hardly cries, he is such a good baby, he eats well with a 5 ounce bottle every 3 hours and he sleeps all way through the night! He has the cutest dimples when he smiles and he is trying to laugh now which is sooo cute.x Everyone loves him, everyone wants to look after him so much so that I am going to start saying no as I want him in a routine and I want him to know who his mummy and daddy is! Best thing about it is that I am his mummy and I have the right to say Yes or No without feeling guilty!
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
Been sick
Been pregnant has really taken it toll on me. I am always tired and these last few days have been a nightmare of sickness and tiredness. I cant be bothered getting up and doing anything I just want to lay on the sofa all day watching my mum play on the x box.
Things are just going to get worse as me and Joel finially have our own home. we will be moving in this weekend coming and I am excited but dredding having to get up and move about. If this sickness dunt stop then im in big trouble haha!
Cant be bothered writing owt else as my hands a numb with how cold I am. I hate been cold.x so untill I'm on line in my new home I will leave the internet well alone!!! take care all.x
Things are just going to get worse as me and Joel finially have our own home. we will be moving in this weekend coming and I am excited but dredding having to get up and move about. If this sickness dunt stop then im in big trouble haha!
Cant be bothered writing owt else as my hands a numb with how cold I am. I hate been cold.x so untill I'm on line in my new home I will leave the internet well alone!!! take care all.x
Sunday, 7 February 2010
Been Pregnant!
Things have been rather mentle since finding out I am pregnant. I constantly feel ill and tired, my body is swelling horribly! I have been having a really emotional rollercoaster of a ride with the whole thing and felt like I'm going threw it on my own. Joel says he cares and I know he does but once in a while I could do with him showing it.
I have my first scan tomorrow, I'll know for def how far along I am and a near to exact date for my babys birth. I am really nervous but excited too, I hope my baby is healthy and growing right.
I am making this a short one today as I do not have much to say, so ill keep you all up to date with everything.x
I have my first scan tomorrow, I'll know for def how far along I am and a near to exact date for my babys birth. I am really nervous but excited too, I hope my baby is healthy and growing right.
I am making this a short one today as I do not have much to say, so ill keep you all up to date with everything.x
Friday, 1 January 2010
OMG!
Things have been rather eventful this Christmas and New Year, It all started on the 20th December, it was an ordinary Sunday, Joel and I had been stopping at my mate Claire's for the weekend, we was just getting ready to leave, I needed the loo so off I went and took my handbag with me, I took my handbag because it had my pregnancy test in it, so I took the test and well it came back positive, I was in shock! I shouted Claire up the stairs and I showed her the test and we cuddled and giggled and what not.
When I got down stairs Claire's dad Chris asked me if I was having an affair with Claire Hahahaha so I said yes, I sat on the sofa next to Joel and typed on my phone "took the test, I'm pregnant" well the spark in his eye told me everything, we got our gear together quick and left, soon as we shut the door Joel pulled me in to his arms. Bless him he is rather a soppy bugger at heart lol. He did have the cheek later on to call me heartless just because I didn't cry! ho hummm! any ways we went round select few and told them our news, mostly everyone was happy for us and we swelled with pride that we are becoming parents.
When it cam to telling Joel's dad, I made Joel tell him and he was sooo scared, which made me scared, but all turned out fantastic, Joel, unfortunately, didn't take it like a man but that is all I'm saying hahahaha! his dad however is happy, and also excited about becoming a grandad.
I have seen the midwife and have been told that Baby Grainger is due August 2010. so we have a long time to go but as we have a lot of things to sort out I'm sure everything will pass over real quick.x
Unfortunately been pregnant at Xmas is a nightmare when your a smoker and love a few glasses of wine, as I could not do either! I have been an emotional wreck through the whole thing and even come close to falling out with Joel, poor bloke really does take a lot of stick from me!
Also my boobs are horrible! they are a nice size before pregnancy kicks in now they are chuffing huge and I'm only 8 weeks pregnant, I dread to think how big they will be by the time I give birth, they are also really sore. I am currently also suffering with period like cramps at the sides of my tummy, I have been told this is normal for some women so I should not worry too much.
I have been able to do plenty of reading up on the week by week stages of pregnancy and how the baby is growing week by week too. Unfortunately it has severely put me off from wanting to go in to labour, so Joel my love, thanks for the wonderful baby book you got me for Xmas, now I don't want kids!!!!!!!! lol. I have to go threw with this pregnancy as I personally do not agree at all with abortions, it is murder in my eyes and I could not do that to my baby!
Any ways I have finished my hot chocolate that Joel kindly made for me so I am now gonna catch up on some beauty sleep if I am able to get cosy enough to do so.x Here's to a wonderful new year everyone! wish you all a wonderful time and all the best!
When I got down stairs Claire's dad Chris asked me if I was having an affair with Claire Hahahaha so I said yes, I sat on the sofa next to Joel and typed on my phone "took the test, I'm pregnant" well the spark in his eye told me everything, we got our gear together quick and left, soon as we shut the door Joel pulled me in to his arms. Bless him he is rather a soppy bugger at heart lol. He did have the cheek later on to call me heartless just because I didn't cry! ho hummm! any ways we went round select few and told them our news, mostly everyone was happy for us and we swelled with pride that we are becoming parents.
When it cam to telling Joel's dad, I made Joel tell him and he was sooo scared, which made me scared, but all turned out fantastic, Joel, unfortunately, didn't take it like a man but that is all I'm saying hahahaha! his dad however is happy, and also excited about becoming a grandad.
I have seen the midwife and have been told that Baby Grainger is due August 2010. so we have a long time to go but as we have a lot of things to sort out I'm sure everything will pass over real quick.x
Unfortunately been pregnant at Xmas is a nightmare when your a smoker and love a few glasses of wine, as I could not do either! I have been an emotional wreck through the whole thing and even come close to falling out with Joel, poor bloke really does take a lot of stick from me!
Also my boobs are horrible! they are a nice size before pregnancy kicks in now they are chuffing huge and I'm only 8 weeks pregnant, I dread to think how big they will be by the time I give birth, they are also really sore. I am currently also suffering with period like cramps at the sides of my tummy, I have been told this is normal for some women so I should not worry too much.
I have been able to do plenty of reading up on the week by week stages of pregnancy and how the baby is growing week by week too. Unfortunately it has severely put me off from wanting to go in to labour, so Joel my love, thanks for the wonderful baby book you got me for Xmas, now I don't want kids!!!!!!!! lol. I have to go threw with this pregnancy as I personally do not agree at all with abortions, it is murder in my eyes and I could not do that to my baby!
Any ways I have finished my hot chocolate that Joel kindly made for me so I am now gonna catch up on some beauty sleep if I am able to get cosy enough to do so.x Here's to a wonderful new year everyone! wish you all a wonderful time and all the best!
Tuesday, 1 December 2009
Coming or going......
Some times I wonder were life will lead me, I know things in life are changing for the better but one thing I hate doing is waiting, and as things stand at the minute all I do is wait. My sleeping has gone way down hill again and I'm not waking up till mid afternoon, it drives Joel crazy as he has work in the mornings and I'm just a pest all the time keeping him awake.
The nightmares I often have now adays are whats waking me up 4 or 5 times a night. I really should see my doctor about it but I hate having to go to her about such trivial things.
Personally I hate going to the doctors any way so instead I have taken up baking in hopes that it will fill in some gaps on a daily basis, so far no such luck.
My weekends are the best as me and Joel go up to my mates house for the weekend. We have a fairly good time and get to watch some great films and have a few drinks.
Well as its nearly 10 to 4 in the morning I'm going to leave this short and sweet and go see if i can get in to bed without waking Joel up.
Take care all.xx
The nightmares I often have now adays are whats waking me up 4 or 5 times a night. I really should see my doctor about it but I hate having to go to her about such trivial things.
Personally I hate going to the doctors any way so instead I have taken up baking in hopes that it will fill in some gaps on a daily basis, so far no such luck.
My weekends are the best as me and Joel go up to my mates house for the weekend. We have a fairly good time and get to watch some great films and have a few drinks.
Well as its nearly 10 to 4 in the morning I'm going to leave this short and sweet and go see if i can get in to bed without waking Joel up.
Take care all.xx
Tuesday, 17 November 2009
Proposal.....
Things have been a bit hectic since I last left a note. I can't tell you in order how things have happened as I'm stupid and do not remember things very well ha ha!
Some things have not been so great, like one Saturday I had an awful day, I had fun in 2 ways and they were that I met Lyndsey for the 1st time and i got to go shopping, but everything else was a disaster.
I was in Asda with my mate and her dad, we were buying booze for a night in, and some one spat over the banister right on to my head, I was absolutely fuming mad!
It was also raining that day so my beautiful curls I had through my hair washed out and I looked like I had been dragged through a hedge backwards, I pride my self highly on how I look and I was not looking good at all this day!
Later that night after I had my fave meal, spag bol, I started getting some serious pains in my tummy, I am used to pain in my tummy as I always seem to have a problem with it, but this was so much worse, as time wore on the pain got worse and worse and I ended up laying on my back on the floor with my feet near my bum, I was wearing a dress so my fiancee covered me with a quilt. eventually the pain got too much to cope with and I started crying, Joel then realised that this was serious and he phoned for an ambulance as I literally could not move, when the paramedics came they gave me gas and air so they could move me to the ambulance, all the drama of this day was wearing me thin and i thought "god can this day get any worse", any way we got to the hospital and they did some tests on me and luckily I was OK, I had a water infection nearing my kidneys hence all the pain, they put me on antibiotics and sent me off home.
As I was staying at my mates house this night we headed back there, I then had my other mate having a flipping fit because no one wanted to drink with her, I could not as I had to take my antibiotics right away but she made me not take it and made me drink so I did as she wanted.
At around 3 in the morning my mates wondered down to the spar to get some wine for me to drink and Katie who was paying for it did not get lemonade to go with it. I was not too happy as I can not drink wine straight.
So Katie then started having a fit with me because she had spent "so much money" on me, (no offence as I am grateful for her buying the wine for me but it only cost her 10 quid for 2 bottles!), she was f'ing and blinding all over the place and i was really upset, She thought I was asleep while she did all this shouting her mouth off but I was curled up to Joel biting my own tongue so hard so I didn't say anything back to her! eventually she buggered of to bed and I had my moaning session to everyone about her attitude!
On to a more happier note I have had a couple of excellent things happen for me,
The first excellent thing that has happened is my wonderful partner proposed to me. I personally would not change the way he did it as it was not romantic at all, not like the dream proposal that every woman wants. He got down on one knee in the K2 night club and whispered in my ear asking me to marry him, I obviously said yes!
The second fantastic thing is that my half sister Lyndsey found us through face book and I got the chance too meet up with her after 13 years of not seeing her. She is a fantastic young woman now and I am over the moon that I have her in my life!
Joel and me have tickets curtsy of his sister Fran, she gave us both these for our birthdays, they are tickets to the Alhambra to see Joseph and the Technicolour dream coat, we are heading to see that this Friday. I am excited about that as before we go there Joel is taking me out for a meal, which will be really lovely. Also this Friday the 2nd Twilight film comes out so we are heading to see that next week which is another thing I can't wait to do hehehehe!
Life is so busy yet so good that I feel like I am on top of the world every now and then. I still go through depression, it hits like a brick and I take it out on Joel so much but hopefully things will start getting to wear I want them to be.x
Some things have not been so great, like one Saturday I had an awful day, I had fun in 2 ways and they were that I met Lyndsey for the 1st time and i got to go shopping, but everything else was a disaster.
I was in Asda with my mate and her dad, we were buying booze for a night in, and some one spat over the banister right on to my head, I was absolutely fuming mad!
It was also raining that day so my beautiful curls I had through my hair washed out and I looked like I had been dragged through a hedge backwards, I pride my self highly on how I look and I was not looking good at all this day!
Later that night after I had my fave meal, spag bol, I started getting some serious pains in my tummy, I am used to pain in my tummy as I always seem to have a problem with it, but this was so much worse, as time wore on the pain got worse and worse and I ended up laying on my back on the floor with my feet near my bum, I was wearing a dress so my fiancee covered me with a quilt. eventually the pain got too much to cope with and I started crying, Joel then realised that this was serious and he phoned for an ambulance as I literally could not move, when the paramedics came they gave me gas and air so they could move me to the ambulance, all the drama of this day was wearing me thin and i thought "god can this day get any worse", any way we got to the hospital and they did some tests on me and luckily I was OK, I had a water infection nearing my kidneys hence all the pain, they put me on antibiotics and sent me off home.
As I was staying at my mates house this night we headed back there, I then had my other mate having a flipping fit because no one wanted to drink with her, I could not as I had to take my antibiotics right away but she made me not take it and made me drink so I did as she wanted.
At around 3 in the morning my mates wondered down to the spar to get some wine for me to drink and Katie who was paying for it did not get lemonade to go with it. I was not too happy as I can not drink wine straight.
So Katie then started having a fit with me because she had spent "so much money" on me, (no offence as I am grateful for her buying the wine for me but it only cost her 10 quid for 2 bottles!), she was f'ing and blinding all over the place and i was really upset, She thought I was asleep while she did all this shouting her mouth off but I was curled up to Joel biting my own tongue so hard so I didn't say anything back to her! eventually she buggered of to bed and I had my moaning session to everyone about her attitude!
On to a more happier note I have had a couple of excellent things happen for me,
The first excellent thing that has happened is my wonderful partner proposed to me. I personally would not change the way he did it as it was not romantic at all, not like the dream proposal that every woman wants. He got down on one knee in the K2 night club and whispered in my ear asking me to marry him, I obviously said yes!
The second fantastic thing is that my half sister Lyndsey found us through face book and I got the chance too meet up with her after 13 years of not seeing her. She is a fantastic young woman now and I am over the moon that I have her in my life!
Joel and me have tickets curtsy of his sister Fran, she gave us both these for our birthdays, they are tickets to the Alhambra to see Joseph and the Technicolour dream coat, we are heading to see that this Friday. I am excited about that as before we go there Joel is taking me out for a meal, which will be really lovely. Also this Friday the 2nd Twilight film comes out so we are heading to see that next week which is another thing I can't wait to do hehehehe!
Life is so busy yet so good that I feel like I am on top of the world every now and then. I still go through depression, it hits like a brick and I take it out on Joel so much but hopefully things will start getting to wear I want them to be.x
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